The "Stop Sign" - An Easy, Bully-Stopping, Back-To-School Personal Safety Tip

It has been estimated that roughly 77% of all students are bullied either physically or verbally. As a parent, grandparent, martial artist, and human being, that statistic blows my mind.

For the victims, the consequences of being bullied can be devastating, life-altering, and sometimes life-ending. So before your kids go back to school, please have a serious talk with them about bullies. Discuss who the bullies might be, how they might behave, and how not to be a bully themselves. Then teach your child when and how to use the "Stop Sign" as a way to stop bullies in their tracks.

Who are these bullies?
Bullies are kids with many issues, who take out their anger, aggression, and negative feelings on others. They're everywhere, in every neighborhood, and their dirty deeds can be subtle to down-right shocking. They're in day cares, schools, playgrounds, shopping malls, online, or even in your own family. Bullies come in all shapes, sizes, ages, and genders.

Although they don't have the word "bully" tattooed on their foreheads, they can be easily identified by their nasty words and their hurtful or violent actions directed towards those they consider weaker than themselves. Essentially, they talk and act like... well... bullies. The good news is that many attacks by bullies and mean girls can be stopped before they start by giving the attacker the "Stop Sign."

What's the "Stop Sign?"
The "Stop Sign" is a simple self-defense technique. It should be used at the very beginning of a verbal or physical attack. This is how it works: If a kid has become the intended victim of a bully, he or she should look the bully in the eyes, forcefully put his or her palm out towards the bully's face, and say "Stop!" in a strong tone. After giving the "Stop Sign" they should immediately turn and walk or run away. Then, as soon as possible, they should report the encounter to their parents, teachers, or another trusted adult.

Ignoring a bully doesn't work. But giving a bully the "Stop Sign" does. It makes a bold statement. It says, "I am strong. I will stand up for myself. I will not be your victim!" Bullies like weak and easy victims. Acting strong, even if you're just pretending to be strong, shows the bully that you aren't going to be weak or easy. Plus, when your arm is outstretched, it puts further distance between you and the bully. That's a basic martial arts technique: Stay out of reach of your opponent.

I encourage you to do a little role-playing of possible bullying scenarios with your child. With a little practice, even a toddler can be taught how and when to do the "Stop Sign." Like 1, 2, 3, this technique is really easy to do and easy to remember.
1. Do the Stop Sign, including saying, "Stop!"
2. Walk or run away.
3. Tell a trusted adult.
Together, we can train our children to be bully-proof. Without easy victims, there will be far fewer bullies. Sometimes, the answer to a difficult problem really is in the palm of your hand!

Susan Martinez is the mother of a teenage daughter, Amber, who was kidnapped by a stranger, fought back, and escaped. Amber credits her abilty to escape to the self-protection tips that her mother taught her. 


Martinez is the author of ten books and is a second degree black belt at Master Jake Erling's "The Art Martial Arts Academy" in St. Paul, MN. Email: susanm@tjsusan.com. Web Sites: http://www.susanmartinez1.com http://www.theart-karate.com

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